Love shouldn't feel like a battlefield.
You are worthy of a love story that is kind to your heart.
UNSHIELDED INTIMACY
put down the old defense mechanisms and bring on a healthy and fulfilling connection
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Whether you are single, in relationship or in-between, for about half the time, the ball is in your court.
Unshielded Intimacy is a personalized mentorship with a group component that supports you to learn how to show up for those defining moments intentionally, skillfully and with an open heart.
THIS IS FOR YOU IF
you're single, and...
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You are looking for a relationship that is a source of support, not stress​
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You are ready to leave "situationships" and drama with unavailable partners behind
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You realize that you've been doing dating backwards:
get physically intimate first and then try to figure out the rest, while your decision-making ability is strongly influenced by bonding hormones
...and you want to change that
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you struggle with letting go when a man shows you he isn't ready to commit - and you want to start showing up differently in that situation
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you want dating to feel more peaceful, not keeping you on edge all the time​
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you're in relationship, and...
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You love your partner, but the relationship is just not giving you the fulfillment you desire
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You want to go to bed and wake up feeling grateful for your relationship - instead of the constant questioning of how you are ever going to end the same repeating arguments that are creating cracks in your connection
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You know that relationships bring up childhood wounding and triggers, but you are still not sure how to navigate this
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You want to feel IN LOVE with your partner again, instead of feeling frustrated most of the time
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You want to experience more peace in your relationship, so that you are not always “on”
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You are aware there is a problem
- and when there is a problem, you try to do something about it.
You likely already know a fair bit about how dating and relationships tend to bring up childhood stuff.
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You feel that, with enough time, you can probably piece things together and grow into the kind of partner you want to be.
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Or figure out what it means to really have your own back when dating.
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But you also know that this one learning lands much more deeply when you don’t have to buckle down and battle through the uncharted terrain of relational healing.
You can lighten the process and gift yourself with being exquisitely supported, so you can focus on healing, instead of figuring out the path forward and how the pieces of learning connect.
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I am Andela and I am a trauma-trained mental health coach whose work centers on intimacy and relationships.
After 8 years of helping women hold themselves through ALL the feelings, re-connecting with the parts of themselves they’ve abandoned and finding home within themselves…
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I know that, for many, the natural continuation of coming home to oneself is the yearning to find home with another - find home within a loving relationship.
Likely, you aren’t just looking for “how to’s” of finding and sustaining that special intimate connection -
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you are looking for someone to meet you just where you are, understand your hopes and joys and doubts and pain,
before they help you find your way forward.
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I would be honored to support you,
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Like J., who went from feeling out of control, sabotaging his relationships through compulsive behaviours - to a loving and deeply intimate relationship, in which no parts of him need to stay hidden.
- J.
"It's very hard to summarize the massive impact working with Andela had.
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I have an understanding of myself, my needs and my emotions that I had never felt possible.
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Most important of all, I have a loving and deeply integrated relationship with my partner based on truth and transparency."
READ J.'s FULL STORY
READ J.'sFULL STORY
this is what it looks like inside Unshielded Intimacy:
If you're curious,
There is no default week-by-week outline you must follow.
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Instead, you are given access to a wealth of resources organized into categories by topic that essentially tell you “if you are struggling with x, explore this category to get clarity, ideas or strategies (or inspiration, encouragement and a virtual hug)”.
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So that, when you experience rejection and are about to resort to an old coping mechanism, you
don't have to wait until "week 5" to access the exact information you need now.
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Or when you've just had an argument with your partner and feel the way you never wanted to feel like in the company of the person you love, you know that the words you need to hear now aren't locked behind "available to you in 6 days" message.
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Rather, the relevant resource will always be at your fingertips.
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6 core topics
Here are the
...where you experience an array of ways to to bring about the sense of “I’ve got this.”
This is where you learn how to deeply presence and hold yourself through all the feelings that dating and relationships bring up
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how to bring your nervous system back into homeostasis.
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AT HOME WITH YOURSELF
You're seeing a lot of topics relevant for you up there, but it's a lot and you already don't know where to start and what to prioritize?
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That is why this isn't a self-study course, but a personalized mentorship.
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I am here for you, personally, with extensive 1:1 access.
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For as long as you need me.
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Because this also isn't a "3 month mastermind that will change everything" sort of offer - that leaves you feeling like it was failure on your part if you didn't manage to change your life around - in 3 months.
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When it comes to the length of your stay inside Unshielded Intimacy, there are
3 options.
Depending on how deep you want to go and how big of a change you desire
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- and how many of the above listed topics you want and need to tackle in order to to bring that change about, you can stay with me for:
MONTHS
4
for 1-2 topics
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MONTHS
8
for 3-4 topics
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MONTHS
12
for 5-6 topics
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It is an ongoing program, with no "beginning" and "end".
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The minimum 4 month commitment ensures the intimacy of the experience - you will be journeying side by side with the same group of women for at least 4 months.
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Only at the 4 month mark will you see some new faces, if you are staying longer - and then the container closes again to give enough time for the newcomers to integrate and feel at home with one another.
To summarize:
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This is what a month
inside of
UNSHIELDED
INTIMACY
looks like:
2 private sessions a month (1 - 1,5 h each): for personalized strategy and deep healing work on your key topics
1 group workshop (1h):
for encouragement, inspiration and community support
Access to highly relevant resources (mix of videos, audios and word docs):
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so that you have a place to go to and get clarity just when you need it
A space to connect with other women on the journey at all times
Yes, you read that correctly, THAT extensive 1:1 support.
Your investment
4
months of support: €1300 on a monthly payment plan
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or €1150 pay-in-full (you save 150€)
8
months of support: €2500 on a monthly payment plan
I am gifting you a €100 off (in comparison to 4 month option) so you can take yourself out for a self-care day to celebrate your commitment to going deep and thorough with inner work.
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or €2300 pay-in-full
(you save 300€* = get a full month FREE)
*calculated off the 4 months on a monthly payment plan option)
12
months of support: €3800 on a monthly payment plan
I am gifting you a €100 off (in comparison to 4 month option) so you can take yourself out for a self-care day to celebrate your commitment to going deep and thorough with your inner work.
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or €3400 pay-in-full
(you save 500€* = get almost 2 months FREE)
NOTE THAT
the enrollment closes on the 6th of May.
But I wouldn't wait until last moment
because as soon as your join, you will receive an additional resource that will allow you to start seeing shifts before we start - and prepare you to move through the healing and learning inside Unshielded intimacy with more ease.
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I have spent the last 8 years helping women to stop abandoning themselves when emotions are high.
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I have compiled my most effective guided meditations, that have me whispering in your ear the directions to find your way back home to yourself - like Google maps for the heart - to be used when you need a hand (or a kinder voice than the one within you at that moment) during an overwhelming day.
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(If you scroll all the way to the bottom of this page, you will find snippets of my past clients' experiences with coming home to themselves.)
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Speaking of past clients, here is another full story of their before and after.
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B. went from avoiding conflict to expressing her needs and having difficult conversations
-which lead to new levels of respect and understanding with her husband.
I acknowledged my tendency to avoid conflict and prioritize keeping the peace over expressing my needs and desires within my relationship.
With Andela's guidance, I embraced a new approach of openness and willingness to communicate my needs, leading to a deeper understanding and mutual respect between my partner and me.
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Rather than feeling like a voiceless people-pleaser, I am gradually evolving into a more integrated and whole person, empowered to chart my own course and embrace the possibilities that lie ahead.
- B.
READ HER FULL STORY
There is one question still left unanswered
...if you are in a relationship, can you really do the work it takes ALONE?
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What about your partner?
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You can bring him on the journey with you.
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You will have access to done-for-you material made to be shared with him (for constructive conversations and new strategies for you BOTH).
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But even more importantly,
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there will be a possibility
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to bring him on some of the calls!
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Are you ready to un-shield and experience the irreplaceable nourishment of deep connection?
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START YOUR APPLICATION BELOW.
(Clicking "apply now" doesn't mean "I am in" - it is more along the lines of "I am interested to explore whether this is a right fit for me".
After you do that, I will ask you to fill out a more detailed application form that will tell me more about your situation -and only if you really are a good fit, we will hop on a call and discuss any remaining details.)
You will receive a full application form and further details within 2 working days of applying.
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And, to keep you company while you wait (or while you are still thinking about it), here are
snippets of my past clients' experiences
what my past clients say
Due to great losses in my childhood, I have already quite early subconsciously chosen certain mechanisms to protect myself – however, this also numbed me.
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At some point I realized this and I knew that I had to change something.
My relationships suffered because I wasn't able to really love someone, including myself.
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After working and feeling through a lot of stuff with Andela's help, I felt secure and safe in myself for the very first time - a basic trust in my abilities and the universe, which was all very new to me.
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— Melanie